Tuesday, March 31, 2009

令人窒息的嚣张

今天接到那个舌头很劲的马太岁电话。马太岁今天不知给谁刺激到,又找人出气。
一拿起话筒,就听见那把十分‘非洲和尚’的声音,劈头第一句:话你刚才去哪里?为什么没有人听电话?
我就好好同她说:电话没响呀?不过算了,你有什么事?
她分明就是想出气,说:什么算了?你知不知道每次开会都拿你们来讲,迟到早退啦,上班时间玩失踪啦。。。
我冷笑一声。
马太岁以为我好欺负,说我还敢笑,继续轰炸我的耳朵。
我开始有点火,就应她:我能怎样?
马太岁开始收火:是咯ho,你能怎样。。
然后开始在那边show她的POWER: 没关系,我去跟老板说,让他帮你。
我心里想:你当我三岁是吗? 你的权力早就跟你byebye了,还haolian什么?
最后还是叫我去帮她找资料。
tiuniasing!!原来她还是个坦姬!!

Monday, March 30, 2009

仲慢过只龟

话说有一天我放工回家,坐motor看到一只乌龟在路边。我觉得它应该是要过马路。我没有停下来,因为开始下毛毛雨了。回家取伞后步行到刚才看见乌龟那里,心里一直在 os :你等我,马上就到了。
manatau,我去到时,那只龟敢敢已经过马路了!!ok!!是已经过马路了!!
头低低的回家,妈妈问我酱紧张走出去做么,钱掉了是吗?
我用很proud的语气说:没有啦,我去救乌龟过马路。妈妈又问:有救到吗?
我很lao kui的说:它自己过了马路。
这时我感到有一群乌鸦飞过。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
结果那天晚上我成了饭桌上的 ‘加料’,还要是‘笑料’!!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

米饭飘香的季节

从前,有一户种稻人家住在一个小屋里。不稳定的收入迫使他们没办法每天吃到香喷喷的白米,为了让心理平衡点,他们订了一个家规~ 四年吃一次大白米饭。
几十年下来,家里的孩子逐渐长大,决定撤改这个不成文的家规。首先,他们把外面买的廉价米放在家里的大白米缸中。女主人年事渐高, 眼里麻麻dei,没有察觉。
四年吃一次,米还是香得诱人,可口得不得了。后来演变成每天都吃饭,女主人开始察觉味道的分别,男主人更是开始抗议这种转变。孩子们彼此手指指,是你!是你!不是我!不是我!
于是男主人想:不如让孩子们来当家吧。也许我也应该退休了?
女主人则看着米缸里的米说: 别吵了!听~米在说话呢!
然后大家就tiamtiam听两种米的对话~
大白米: 我们的quality比你们强多了!
廉价米:没有我们,靠你们填饱肚子真是天方夜谭!
大白米:你看主人的脸色就知道你们有多么难吃!
廉价米:呸!跟你们这班老不死讲道理也是塞gas!brother们!给我上!
于是缸里的米打了起来~
最后,那户人家吃的是打架打到变米碎的粮食吗?No!No!No!他们吃的是进口香米!
因为再也没法忍受吃低等米的日子了!发奋图强去了!

(纯属励志小故事,奉劝各位要努力改善生活,不可自暴自弃。)

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

三鞠躬

我在花园里听到老蟋蟀在叫:做么你们不要来西边找吃?
东边的蝉也在叫: 西边没有同类,你们不会讲我们的话,去那边不是找吃,是找死!!
老蟋蟀又叫:哪里会?看我,嘛是吃到肥私大只。你们不喜欢过来,不要讲我们的是非,饿死不关我事,ok?
蝉又叫:你们就是吃到肥肥大大只所以才容易撑死。看到地上那些死蟋蟀没?
老蟋蟀又叫:乱乱讲!!他们是老死的!!
蝉叫: 我们不会上当的!孩子们,那边有更绿的花园,我们还是快快飞过去吧。
我听到嗡嗡声从东边花园迁移到南边花园。
第二天,我从窗口看出去。看到了老园丁在喷射环保酵素杀虫。
命水啊。。。在此,我给死翘翘的老幼蟋蟀三鞠躬。

(本文只是家中花圃观察记录,切勿对号入座,谢谢!)

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Tongue Power

Today is another new lesson for me. The lesson is tongue is such a powerful thing. Know why? Because black also can turn into white by tongue.
The story begins with me getting scold for not updated with the infor that my boss let me decide the travel agency to handle our travelling matters. Fine.. I'll decide on my own and left his secretary alone. This was not heard only by myself but my colleague that need that booking too. And I was scold twice for so stupid and undecideable.
After she got the scold from our big boss for my booking on expensive costs, I was scold again for doing it through agency. Walaoeh.. do like what you say kena scold, not do also kena scold. WTF!!
Now she was telling me that all the booking shall be handle by her until further notice.
Padan Muka!! That day big boss tell my colleague to ask her to help, she scold me instead of helping me. Now I do as what you say, you dare not to admit to the boss what you've said. So push the responsiblitiy to me lor.. so easy ..
But I also pity her.. her boss resigned and she was left with nothing except that tongue. Ok.
I decided to forgive her tongue. At least, if I'm fired because of this, I still can look for another job.But she?? I doubt she will get another job better than her current pay because nobody will pay over 5k for a tongue that walks around and scold you for not buying her any gift from your personal trip.HaHaHa!!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

办公室三明治

今天我终于明白什么叫办公室三明治了.人地大摇大摆去 Lim kopi,明打明蛇王,我不得管闲事.
如今阿细出memo 打蛇,我讲不讲pun死,扮惯卒子的我,突然升左做VVIP cum 二五子.
希望阿细不好叫我讲啦!

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Again!!

I think really I'm not the one who can stand this kind of working attitude. After people handover still can die die say' you never give me ba..' how shit!! then discover the things is prepared but yet to sign. Hello!! I give you the thing on 18th Feb & what are you guys doing with it until 13 Mac also haven't sign?
When TM cut the service, I pula receive the blaim for not checking the payment. Why am I so pity de? Done nothing wrong also get the blaim? Is it just because I'm not their race of people?